"No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it." 1 Corinthians 10:13
Honestly, I didn't have a clue what to write about. I am on day two of a fast and I am tired. My brain feels like I am in a fog, and I am ready to go to sleep. I have felt like this pretty much all day. I considered telling myself to just forget this and go to bed. I kept going back and forth in my head to make not completing this task once again okay. Then I got to work.
I just can't stop thinking about food. I even considered ending this fast. It is amazing how much time I spend thinking about food, preparing food, eating food. I notice the days seem to be much longer, and time seems to be dragging. I wondered if it was because I am no longer breaking my day up with meals and snacks.
I was also keep thinking about how far away 19 days are...Will this fast really change anything? Will it really draw me closer to God? Will I see fruit in our ministry? Will God answer my prayers? All this on food...isn't a fast supposed to help get my mind more on Jesus?
That's it. I feel totally convicted. Is food my master? Is that why I cannot stop thinking about it? I get that when Jesus spoke about man not being able to serve two masters, He meant God v. money (Matthew 6:24). But this is serious. Where is my mind? Where is my heart? ON FOOD! What do I do to make this better? Maybe that's just it. Maybe that is the revelation I have been seeking: for God to show me the areas that I need Him. I recognize that I have gone a bit overboard indulging in food lately, especially sweets for the past three months. One of my prayers for this fast was even for God to remove the desire for sweets away from me, and help me to practice better temperance with food. "And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you." Luke 11:9. I asked God to reveal those things to me, and although I wasn't prepared for Him to reveal that, He did.
I've been so focused on food, that I have neglected spending time with my Heavenly Father. This time is an opportunity for me to get back to being in His presence more, and hopefully learning how to find a balance so that I can carry it well after this fast is broken.
As far as the answered prayers and the fast being worth something, well this is what God revealed to me: although I may continue to be tempted for the next 19 days, and so on, God is faithful. His promises are true. And He promised me in 1 Corinthians 10:13 that He will not allow me to be tempted beyond what I can bear. Praise be to God!